Oh the Humidity!

We keep our windows open at night whenever possible to keep air-conditioning costs down. So the other night we thought nothing of going to bed with basically every window open. We had something that the weathermen call an "upper level low pressure system" come through Iowa. So whatever that means, it brought a lot of fog and water vapor close to the ground. At around 3am, our smoke detectors went off all through the house. (They are all connected to each other through our wiring). I guess all the water in the air had brought the particulate matter in the air to above normal levels causing the alarms to go off. Brett jumped out of bed -freaked me out- and then realizing that it was just the good old Midwestern humidity- I got up, closed all the windows, turned on the AC to dry out the house, and went back to bed.

The Atonement and Gratitude

Well, this week has been better than it's not-so-prodigious start. I have been able to let go and relax about more things. (I know, it's only been 3 days, but I have to start somewhere!) I really have been pondering this whole thing, and trying to change myself, my ways, and my thinking for the better.
As I have been pondering this, I was thinking about the Lord and how He sees me and my children. I realized that by trying to be "perfect", not attaining that and then getting completely [angry, frustrated, depressed- choose one] I was in fact, being very imperfect by not accepting the Lord's Atonement in my behalf. Instead of repenting and getting better, I was simply digging myself deeper into a non-Christlike attitude. I think the Lord loves me and my children. I just need to think that all the time, even when things are not perfect.
I also realized that by focusing on all the things that didn't go right, I didn't ever look at the things that did go right. Even on Monday- I got the grocery shopping done, we did do some school, and housework. That is not fancy or a ton of stuff- but hey, why not be happy about it? I have been taught this so often, I wonder how I have lived thus far and still have trouble seeing all my blessings- which when you look- makes me think of the scripture "My cup runneth over." My family and I have been blessed so abundantly, everyday, that if those were the things I focused on, I think even my worst days would take a drastic turn for the better. I really have been given so many blessings.

There was an interesting article in the Ensign that came in the mail yesterday titled "Truths and Lies" (Ensign, October 2009, pgs. 62-65) I think it was written for me. Here is one the things it said:

Lie: I need to prove that I'm worth loving by being perfect. Only when I'm perfect will I be able to experience love from God and others.
Truth: Even though I'm not perfect now, I can have constant access to divine love.

The author writes of some of the ways she fell into this trap and then ends with a quote from Bonnie D. Parkin, former Relief Society President. "Although we can make choices that enable us to experience a heightened or a lesser degree of Gods's love, we can and should be partaking of God's love now, even- and especially- in our imperfect state. We are worth loving because Christ thought we were of enough worth to atone for us individually."

I am grateful for the Lord who loves me and keeps going along with me as I learn and relearn all this.

Venus Fly Trap Mosquito Murder

Yesterday I bought Mr. Man a Venus Fly Trap on a whim while at the grocery store. He has been checking out carnivorous plant books at the library, looking at them in nurseries, etc. Needless to say, he was ecstatic.

I wanted to show the kids how the traps worked- when an insect touches the tiny hairs on the inside of the traps, it closes. So, when I hit and stunned a mosquito I thought "This is the perfect opportunity!"

I picked up the still-alive, but injured mosquito, and called the kids in. I dropped him into one of the traps. He didn't move enough at first to trigger the trap shut. We jiggled the jar and he crawled right out of the trap. So naturally, I picked him up again and set him back in the trap. He again crawled out- this time just in time not to be snapped up by the plant. This is not going well, I thought. So once more, I picked him up, put him in the trap, then used a knife to trigger the hairs and Snap! -mosquito trapped. The children were super excited - and me? I felt like I had committed mosquito murder!

A Really Bad Day, Perfectionism, and Me

Today was, in fact, a really bad day. I think it all started with my desire to get up and get out to a store really early and wondering and then being angry at my children for not jumping on my boat. Things just went downhill from there through grocery shopping to school work to sick Noodle. Anyway, after concluding furiously that the children needed to go to public school and that homeschool just wasn't working- I decided I needed to do some reevaluation.
I realized that I am not very good at starting again- meaning letting things go and moving forward. I also realized after talking with my sister that I expect my children and myself to be "perfect." I don't think that I even have a standard or a non-changing set of rules. I just don't want any of us to do anything loud, wrong, embarassing, etc. It is embarassing to say, but I think I have been judging our family (especially the kids) on what I think others are thinking of them- which then reflects directly back to me (in my idea). I think that I usually think the worst of them, even when others just look at them as kids doing kid things- I see them as MY kids being crazy, rude and obnoxious. It is unfair to them for sure, as I do not look at other children and think "Wow, they don't know how to stand still and hold onto the cart in a store, or write their name perfectly, or think their questions are crazy" I just think they are kids and most of the time they are cute and showing their personality. Why can't I do the same for my kids? Or even myself? Anyway, I know that my attitude needs to change for sure- why not give my own kids the same benefit of just being kids? It is a hard for me to admit that really it is my own perception of things that needs to change, not my children, as they really are cute, wonderful, intelligent kids. Sure they are not perfect, but (HA!) neither am I and I have had about 20 more years to work on "being perfect." All in all, I need to relax about a LOT of things. I think I need to realize that my days probably won't go exactly as planned and that those days can still be good, worthwhile days. I know things won't change overnight, but I am hoping realization will help me to calm down about how things go with them at school and otherwise. I sure hope so, I don't think I or they can take another "Monster Mom" day.

For Thy Bounteous Blessings

We have been very blessed this year with a bountiful, beautiful, garden both at our city garden plots and our raised beds at home. We love being able to eat the "fruits of our labors." Of course, my most bounteous blessings are my wonderful children, who also happen to love eating our garden produce (and I couldn't be prouder!).

Here are some of my recent canning adventures with local fruit and vegetables from my garden. I love the feeling of having all this in store for the winter. I know it isn't the most cost effective, but I love that I did it, and that it is homemade. There is nothing like opening a jar of salsa from your own garden when it is snowing outside!

This picture is of one of our harvest trips from our city plot garden. Mr. Man loves to bring home all the veggies.

These are carrots from our backyard garden. They are so tasty! They grew so much better and longer in the loose, composty soil here rather than the clay soil at the city garden plot.

If you have ever grown beans, you know that they are almost always plentiful, as you can see here. This was our second year growing onions- we have had a great harvest! (These were the early "thinnings")